Be Chill

“Progress is rarely a straight line. There are always bumps in the road, but you can make the choice to keep looking ahead.” -Kara Goucher

One of the things we consistently try to instill in our clients is the reality that just because we “feel” something to be true (emotionally speaking) doesn’t automatically make it true. Clients at times feel something SO strongly (anxiety, fear, anger, sadness, etc) that they quickly believe that feeling this way is a crisis and something to run from, avoid or hide from.  The truth being that the majority of the time their emotions, while valid and worthy of noting, are often not the true picture of reality.  Good therapeutic work can come from helping clients notice their emotions WITHOUT being controlled by them.  Life happens and emotions come and go. Feeling anxious, angry, sad or fearful isn’t a crisis. It’s not a sign that they are a “bad” person.  Feelings are just little signals that want to be honored and recognized. We can honor our emotions and our feelings without feeling paralyzed by them and thus ineffective in moving through life in healthy ways.

This is, of course, always easier said than done. At times, I feel like the poster child for making things into a crisis.  This comes out most apparently when I’m sensing an ache or pain in my body or even a full blown injury.  I’m one week out from my spring marathon in Athens, Ohio (http://www.athensmarathon.org/Athens_Marathon/home.html).  All season long I’ve had a little nagging pain in my left hip but it’s been nothing too challenging, usually goes away with some stretching and rest.  Being on the treadmill for about 75% of my runs this year (don’t get me started on this crappy winter) hasn’t helped.  Having a job where I sit 90% of my day doesn’t help.  About a week ago I had a long tempo run that I barely finished. Afterwards I hurt...REALLY hurt. The next day I was limping and when I would push on my hip, I cringed. This sent me over the edge. WHAT AM I GOING TO TO? WILL I BE ABLE TO RUN? WHAT IF I CAN’T? WHAT WILL I DO? WHAT IF IT’S A STRESS FRACTURE? WHAT IF IT’S WORSE? WHAT IF I CAN’T DO MY IRONMAN? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

When things like this happen I will either: 1. Figure out contingency plans...usually plan B, C and D; or 2. Completely shut down. Both seemed likely (after the panic of course). Before I had even talked to my coach about my pain I had formed other plans in my mind to suggest in order to help myself feel like I was back in control of the situation. That’s the BIGGEST problem with injury….we feel completely out of control. We somehow want to regain said control by a number of various ways OR we just get pissed because no athlete I know doesn’t like to have control of their body. Never did I consider that I had time to work through this injury and that perhaps, just perhaps I could still run Athens.

After talking to my coach, I went full steam ahead. I got my hip checked out, no stress fracture. Diagnosis: a strained TFL muscle, which is due to my weak hips...something I’ve known about for years (read about TFL here: http://www.rehab4runners.co.uk/running-injuries/hip-groin-pain/tfl-pain/). My sports doc said I could rehab it with some rest, good ART massage and some PT. Ok, feeling a tad better. Next was my chiropractor. Same decision. I could rest, keep up with my swimming, biking and light running and get some ART massage. Last was my ART massage therapist. Same feeling, it’s the the TFL and I could still do this. Ok, so if the professionals are all saying the same thing, and my coach is still pushing me to mentally look towards Athens instead of backing out, maybe I can calm the heck down a little.

So I’m resting. And tapering. And trying to stay positive. Today is the first day I’ve woken up and not felt much hip pain (knock on wood). I’ve tried to really rest and trust that the hay is in the barn. I’m going to embrace the taper enough so that I'm itching to get going on April 13 at 8am in Athens, Ohio. And I’m going to calm down and recognize that this entire training life is about progression, perseverance and patience. Just because I panic and freak out doesn’t mean I’m in a crisis or need to make a crisis out of my situation. I need to practice what I consistently preach...calm the $#%^ down and breathe. This isn’t a crisis. I’ll be ok and I’m capable enough to figure this out. Be chill. Be Brave.