Be Humbled

So I went into the Athens Marathon with big hopes and expectations of myself. Despite the fact that I had been suffering from hip pain and TFL issues (http://www.rehab4runners.co.uk/running-injuries/hip-groin-pain/tfl-pain/) for the past many few weeks, I had been diligent in the recent 2 weeks about stretching, resting, getting ART massage and PT therapy. I had done the training and was confident I could pull out a 3:45-3:50 marathon finish. All my speed work and training had indicated this would be a no brainer….and plus, the course at Athens is flat. Piece of cake, right.

The temps for the race start were in the 50’s and by the end it would be near 80 degrees. No problem, I figured. I really do well in the heat. That’s actually true, I just neglected to remember that I’d had literally NO chances to practice training in such heat over the miserable Ohio winter we've had. I had a nutrition plan and hydration plan and mental “mantra” plan. I decided I wasn't going to make the same mistakes I had made in my previous 2 marathons: going out too fast and bonking due to lack of nutrition. I had a good dinner the night before and felt rested.

The race started out well, I was moving along without any hip pain and at a pretty good clip (ok, maybe a bit too fast, but I was still doing ok). The Athens course is out and back along their bike path which is fine, just kinda lonely with little crowd support (www.athensmarathon.org). When the half marathoners turned around I still felt good. I continued to keep up on my plan until the turnaround point for us full marathoners, about 13-14 miles. Turning around was a rude awakening. We were running INTO the wind. And this wasn’t just a little breeze, this was constant and probably at least 20 mph. It felt like running into a wind tunnel. Because the leaves on the trees along the bike path weren’t in bloom yet, there was nothing to stop the wind. I kept plugging along, thinking that it would give at some point.

At about mile 15-16, my hip started to seize up. It hurt a bit but nothing I could keep moving forward on so I did. In the wind tunnel. Ugh, it was rough. I kept trying to mentally push myself forward. I played “chase” with a few other runners and we joked about the crazy wind, because obviously it was affecting us all. At about mile 18 my hip was hurting more and I noticable slowed. This was frustrating me but I just figured my A+ goal would have to be put off for now. I still had goal B. Kept moving forward. By this time the heat was getting rough. (And on a side note, even though you like your Marathoner in Training (www.trainwithmit.com) t-shirt that says “PACER” on the back...don’t wear it in a race. It’s not worth the aggravation).

By mile 20 I was in more pain. I stopped to stretch and lost more time. The heat was more intense and the wind tunnel didn't stop. I knew I was slowing but I kept running. Just anything to move me forward at this point. By mile 21 I was starting to cry….for my lost goals and also due to pain. I had a medical personnel ask me to slow down and come off the course. Nope, I kept going. Ugh. By mile 24 I was limping a bit and just couldn't get that damned TFL muscle to relax. Again, a medical person asked if I was ok and if I needed to stop and be escorted to the finish. At this point? No way. I’ll crawl if I have to. My B goal was over. Ok, maybe I can still finish under 4 hours.

I figured once we were off the bike path the wind would shift. Haha, wrong. Kept pushing me backwards. I kept thinking my Garmin would auto pause at some point, not believing I was actually moving ahead. When I entered the finish area at mile 26-ish we had to do a 1.25 loops around the track before I finished. I knew at this point the 4 hour mark was gone. Both goals were gone. At that point I kept thinking about my friends who were injured would would have done anything to run my slow pace that day. I was inspired by them on many levels and my empathy for their situation pushed me to finish. I was hurting, crying, hot and sore. I was WAY over the goals I had projected for myself that day and WAY beyond what I knew I was capable of, if I had been stronger and not been dealing with a challenging muscle. But I finished. And yes, I got a post race massage. It was delightful.

I made my way over to the awards tent and was thrilled to see so many of my MIT pals had placed in the half marathon. Those ladies are super bad-ass. I waited around a bit to see my other fellow marathoners finish but after a while I began to cramp up and needed to move. I made my way to my car and got on the road.

Looking back on today there are a lot of things I'm disappointed about. I wanted to PR….I wanted it BAD. And I had tried to do everything possible to make that happen. But I can’t control the weather, the wind or my hip acting up. For me personally, while I'm disappointed about my finish, I'm more proud of the way I've mentally handled this disappointment. Being positive instead of having a pity party is a BIG deal for me. Last year I was PR’ing every race and convinced myself that races were only worth doing if you got a PR. So when the day came that I didn't get a PR (it was bound to happen...DUH), my coach (www.justtri.net) pulled me aside and said to me “Amy, I really need you to focus on what went well here. If you think you are going to PR every race you do, you will NOT last long in this sport.” Wow, that was powerful. So what went well in Athens? I was nutritionally on target. I used my mantras. I kept moving forward when my body was fighting me. I thought of my injured/sidelined friends when I wanted to throw a pity party. I showed up. I started. I finished. I had fun running and smiled at every mile marker and thanked volunteers. I ate a good meal the night before and a more proper breakfast the morning of the race. I rested and listened to my coach and others on my “treatment” team.

While the end result wasn't perfect, I’m taking what I learned and moving on. Boston is still a dream and one day it’ll happen. I hear they do it every year and it’s not going anywhere. This year there are big fish to fry and IMAZ is my glory day. I’ll be back to tackle a marathon again and it’ll be just as much of a gift as today. Be humbled. Be brave.